Thursday, 18 April 2013

P = Pedophilic Perverts

Fear, guilt, anger, frustration, pain, hate and above all helplessness....these assorted and jumbled feelings numbed their existence. In some cases, multiple times, repeatedly they went through the trauma. Devastated & shattered they suffered those nightmares alone. Few of them were not even able to understand that something wrong is done to them. 

A popular talk show hosted by Amir Khan last year - 'Satyamev Jayate' gave few of them a chance to open up their heart. The show startled many of us by highlighting the huge percentage of Child sex abuse victims. Yes, in India, almost every fifth child unfortunately has been abused sexually. 

I heard somewhere which was quoted on a funny note "We are descendants of monkeys....but the problem is that still we have not stopped descending!!". On a serious tone this is so true...those pedophiles have descended far below the human level.....just that these sickos roam around freely in our society in the garb of a human face. SMJ tried to negate many myths involving CSA. Those who are in blog world might have already been aware of the facts behind these CSA myths through well penned posts during CSA Awareness Month. But for rest of the people it was indeed an eye-opener. I am sure there would be many parents who are not comfortable with 'sex education' of their kids must have been shuddered with the horrifying tales of the victims in that show. 

We need to understand that nor are the CSA victims from any different world neither the abusers. Here at this platform now I can also admit being a CSA victim once. I was never able to muster the courage to tell anyone about it that time. But why?...I shared a very open relationship with my parents especially with my dad. Even then I never opened up with him about this matter. I gave subtle hints but they went unnoticed. 

So, you see it is not only healthy & open relationship with your kids that would help but you have to be observant about their body language & changed patterns of behavior as well. Communicate, be aware & come out of your shell of ignorance. Those scars maul the soul of the child which they carry throughout their life...I might have escaped with a bruise but everyone is not so lucky. However memories of those incidents still leaves sour taste in my persona. 

Once hubby told me that they were discussing episodes of SMJ in his office when one of his colleagues said that "Man, What this Amir Khan is serving as Sunday Brunch, they are showing too much reality, It is so depressing. These cases are only there in newspapers...He could have chosen some other theme for his show". Poor man, I think his taste of reality show is limited only to Big Boss or Splitsvilla!! This mindset of 'ostrich in the storm' would only keep up the spirit of heinous monsters. We can always be in our La-la land and believe that it can never happen to our kids but would that make the issue disappear!! 

One very important quote mentioned in the show was "Respect the behaviour, not the age". This can be quite a controversial statement in reference our Indian Culture. But I personally support its validity. 

But the most important point which was raised in SMJ was that CSA should be considered as a crime and strict laws should be there to punish those pedophiles. Whoa!!!...can you believe that it is still not there in our law books and this bill is yet pending (lying in dust) in Rajyasabha. My personal opinion says that these pedophiles should be prosecuted with stringent laws because they are sick...sick mentally. Otherwise why would a person has to feel up a child's body for any kind of physical pleasure!

I can continue to pour my disgust on this issue endlessly but ending here quoting Amir Khan: 

I’d like to leave you with a thought: perhaps the more closed or narrow minded we are about sexuality, the more repressed it gets, and then it manifests itself in ugly ways. I’m hoping that as a society in time we will reach a stage where we are not frightened of our sexuality. Rather, we learn to deal with it in a dignified, open, responsible and healthy manner. 


  1. Great thoughts by Amir Khan but the world has a long way to go before we get there. Hence it always makes me wonder why people choose to plaster pictures of their kids all over the Internet. My kids are grown but I am banned from posting their pics.

  2. The quote, respect the behaviour, not the age had struck me as I was watching the show. The guy seemed to be talking so much sense back there!

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  3. Very true, Nibedita. There are sick monsters that have free rein in our society. I once went to a watch showroom, and saw Duncan Grant in there. He had been released on bail. I went close to him, looked straight at him, and said, "Disgusting." Not very effective, but I just wanted to express my feelings at what a shame it was that the court released him.

  4. I have been a huge fan of Aamir Khan and SMJ. I saw all the episodes but this one you mention here (the second one, it was) was also very moving. I have possibly never cried so much watching anything on TV. I have a 5 year old young lady and I feel really sacred sometimes sending her off to play in the park and such. (Or maybe I am just a psycho)

    This is just the beginning. guess we should educate our children on how to protect themselves and how to raise their voice against anything they consider unjust.

  5. I also liked the workshop conducted by aamir
    When I watched the first episode I cried. All r gory facts but we are better off by knowing them right ? THose who think its a bad theme are fools. Any way we Indians are very much comfortable till it happens to our people or us!
    Pedophilic perverts just scare me to the core

  6. CSA is terrible, a worst nightmare, a living hell a child can go through. Educating our kids and having confidence in them, believing them is very important. And of course the perverts pedophiles should be given the severest of punishment!

  7. Aamir Khan show cased what was already present in our society and we were being blind to them. He did create a stir...but, you have raised a valid point to. We cannot remain blind forever.

  8. Hugs Nibedita..I am completely with you on this. I really appreciated Satyamev Jayate. And i think all the topics discussed on the show are really important but not much of attention is paid to them either by the govt or by the society.
    And CSA is a worst kind of sexual crime that sadly exists in the world. And as a mother of a little child this is something i am really worried about when i send her to school. And it is such a sad state of affair.
    You are right about the importance of open and friendly relationship between parents and the child. I hope we manage to do that with Zini.

  9. Yes, we need to be more open with our children and connect to them in a deeper way than just as a parent. SMJ reinstated what the society kept shoving under the carpet. CSA should be taken very very seriously and more importantly, we should follow what Amir Khan said as a closing note.
    It is very unfortunate that so many people out there want to live in a bubble ignoring the ways of the world...Tch, tch, tch to all those frogs in their
    own comfort wells.

  10. I'm so sorry that you suffered from that ordeal when you were a kid, Nibedita! Yes, so important to really listen to your child in terms of not just what s/he says, but what s/he may be implying too!